Being neither a feminist nor an activist of any sort,however,  I have been touched in my flesh,by the many abuses endured by women in my country of adoption:Democratic Republic of Congo. Too much hate, abuse, rape, and torture of all sorts are comitted against women by so called freedom fighters. Living in Kinshasa, I was never confronted personnally to any case but in the light of the recent atrocious event in Walikale in the eastern part, I lost it completely. I was on a trip abroad when watching CNN I heard the news that day of last august.Over 200 women were raped by Militias. This time the whole world aknowledged the drama and nightmare taking place since 1997 in the Eastern Part of the DR Congo. As I got back in Kinshasa, I saw older women testifying how they have been raped by 5,6,7 or more men. Why? Facing all the pain and hurt women are going through during conflicts, I got hit by a simple question: how can I make a difference? it is happening just next door. I went further, read more and discovered that another region Katanga was the scenery of child abuse and could be sadly nomitated as the world capital of incest. I will not bore you with figures, graphs and statistics but my request here is : should we continue staying in our comfort zone without trying to make a difference? Or should we look around as responsible men and women and identify the abuses around us in order to contribute? Thus having had a very interesting debate with some of my sisters from Northern Nigeria, I found out about some terrible abuse made to women, girls andd children covered up in the name of culture. So once again dear readers , open your eyes and your ears, People in N.G.O’s are not crazy or senseless, they are just sensible men and women trying to give a meaning to their lives by making a difference. And they is nothing such as a small gesture. If people living in New York, London or Stockholm do make a difference by contributing to many causes in Africa, why cant we?


Lessons in Life

I’ve learned that we don’t have to change friends if we understand that friends change.

I’ve learned that just because someone doesn’t love you the way you want them to doesn’t mean they don’t love you with all they have.

I’ve learned that no matter how good a friend is, they’re going to hurt you every once in a while and you must forgive them for that.

I’ve learned that true friendship continues to grow, even over the longest distance. The same goes for true love.

I’ve learned that you can do something in an instant that will give you heartache for life.

I’ve learned that it’s taking me a long time to become the person I want to be.

I’ve learned that you should always leave loved ones with loving words. It may be the last time you see them.

I’ve learned that you can keep going long after you can’t.

I’ve learned that we are responsible for what we do, no matter how we feel.

I’ve learned that either you control your attitude or it controls you.

I’ve learned that regardless of how hot and steamy a relationship is at first, the passion fades and there had better be something else to take its place.

I’ve learned that heroes are the people who do what has to be done when it needs to be done, regardless of the consequences.

I’ve learned that money is a lousy way of keeping score.

I’ve learned that sometimes the people you expect to kick you when you’re down, will be the ones to help you get back up.

I’ve learned that sometimes when I’m angry I have the right to be angry, but that doesn’t give me the right to be cruel.

I’ve learned that maturity has more to do with what types of experiences you’ve had and what you’ve learned from them, and less to do with how many years you have lived.

I’ve learned that it isn’t always enough to be forgiven by others. Sometimes you have to learn to forgive yourself.

I’ve learned that no matter how bad your heart is broken the world doesn’t stop for your grief.

I’ve learned that our background and circumstances may have influenced who we are, but we are responsible for who we become.

I’ve learned that just because two people argue, it doesn’t mean they don’t love each other And just because they don’t argue, it doesn’t mean they do love each other.

I’ve learned that you shouldn’t be so eager to find out a secret. It could change your life forever.

I’ve learned that two people can look at the same thing and see something totally different.

I’ve learned that your life can be changed in a matter of hours by people who don’t even know you.

I’ve learned that even when you think you have no more to give, when a friend cries out to you you will find the strength to help.

I’ve learned that credentials on the wall do not make you a decent human being.

I’ve learned that the people you care about in life are sometimes taken from you far too soon