Recently I have been obsessed by some funny thought: who made the following rules those who create terrible damages in our self-esteems.So let me continue in my favorite free style a listing of the rules:
1-A man must be richer than a woman or make more money.
Is that so? so is that the reason why the new breed of highly educated well paid beautiful Ladies ares still single? I can name a dozen from Casablanca to Cape-Town. Men do you feel castrated by a successful woman. Giirlz tell me what’s wrrong with dating a nice young exec? It happens that most of the sisters who try to adjust to a lower income dude end up being used or abused by a man who tend to develop inferiority complex. So that rule may apply unless Ladies you find the fine black man who is free of complex & secure about his other qualities .Let’s not be desesperate the rare phenomenon exists & might be waiting for you somewhere. Just make sure sisters that you keep a rather low profile on your income at the first dates otherwise you might just attract a gold digger.
2-A man must be taller than his woman.
Does size matter when in bed? obviously not but in terms of aesthetic some girlz have criterias to which they stick until they meet prince charming who is everything but 6 feet tall. So what do yo settle for ? Are you ready to trade the gentleman with the tall bushman? Life is a choice & the inner value of a person might be worth more than his height.
3-A man must be older than his woman.
That sounds so cliché & outdated but some stick to it in their male chase. So Koffi is the best date you have had in years, he has a decent job, seems hardworking & willing to commit but the day he told you his age « I am 32 » , you almost had a heart attack!!! he looked much older than that you assumed he was a solid 36 to 40 years old & could fit in your shopping list. Unfortunately life aint easy & women tend to look young at 40 & beyond which makes them attractive preys for younger guys who generally think they are dealing with same age mate women. STOP having that disgusted look! If Koffi is mature enough & has good manners & above all loves you as much as you do then what is the problem? Oh you are thinking about people. It is none of their business what counts is what YOU want & what PLEASES YOU. So if you feel Koffi is good enough for you then Go for Koffi & enjoy the relationship & why not your marriage. Character is what counts not numbers.
4-Mother in laws are wicked witches
The best In-Law relationship I had was with one the worst relationship i have had soooo… Legend doesn’t make rules & if you have a mother like mine, your Mother in law will be terrified, trust me. You marry the man , not the family unlike they teach us in our African culture. I assume you have received a good home education & you are respectful to elders , so stick to it as well as minding your own business which is YOU & YOUR MAN. To avoid problems avoid slippery comments as well as opiniated ideas about his family, so that you will see the witch syndrom reduced to a minimum. Be careful of the « I am too friendly inlaw » who might just gain to your trust in order to interfere in your private decision. So remember, your Mother in law is a mother to be respected but she is not your mother & she certainly is not your friend. I sure have few examples of exemplary mothers in law but they always work for the best interrest oof their son whatsoever , so make sure you remain being their son’s best interest.
5-One must be married to have kidz
I come from a very muslim background so I think it is questionable, but I believe that after a certain age , if you havent found the right shoe & that your fertility level might decline , i think you have to take a quick decision. It is your life & it is your choice don’t let any one hold you from enjoying Motherhood if you feel ready for it. Make sure you have a clear & honest discussion with your family & man . Also remember that GOD is LOVE & forgiveness & don’t let anyone come between you & your faith.
6-A woman must not leave the father of her kids
That’s the saying & honestly I do believe that one should stay in a realionship or marriage for the good sake of the children but also for her own good. No One should force you to stay in an unhealthy relationship where motherhood becomes the trap in which an abusive man keeps you. Unless you want to have traumatized kids that will grow up with many personality issues. I grew up with just my mum as my dad died early & i was always tagged as a very balanced child so… I just think that one very loving & balanced parent is better than 2 broken ones. So don’t forget staying for the sake of the kid doesn’t end up being the best decision for them. Children need a happy Mum & a happy Dad.
So please be selfish & make the right choice coz life ain’t a rehearsal.