We all have come to realize that some people are truly different. Some possess not only an obvious physical charm but some indefinable quality which would seem to be indestructible by time or age. Helen of troy was one of the few who had this asset and led to the Spartans and Trojans famous war.

The question is when one has a mate, partner, spouse who has this innate physical charm or blessing. Does it evolve to a positive asset or a destructive force? I had a conversation with a customer of mine. He is a well read, very good looking and a successful banker who came to buy things for his spouse from me.

 I saw her pics and I said “ohhh, pretty!!”  but she is quite the opposite, honest to God.

He just smiled and said, “Anuli, don’t lie ,my wife is far from pretty but that is what i love about her” .I got confused and he went on to say “when she is on business class going to the UK, no man will toast her, they are busy looking for those who look like …..,so they leave her for me.I have peace of mind that she is mine alone and needs me more than i, her” .

I looked at this dude again in amazement and said whatever works for one. He does appreciate her because he spent a huge sum for her xmas gifts.

May I use the scenario of Bianca and Ojukwu. Is it really a love story of beauty and the beast? or is he retiring to oblivion with a lovely asset to see as his last glimpse on earth or she doesn’t want the hassle of a young man that would break her heart upon all her beauty, so she wants the adulation and adoration of a man past his prime? What it is, only they know the truth but it does work for them.

I have also heard of people marrying a beautiful wife to open doors. She is hostess and she is sent to handle tough negotiations, all the dues go to the man. It is called trophy wife isn’t? same goes for the women who marry those wickedly handsome men while they look like comet d frog beside them,to also enrich themselves. Some men i know are worse than Interpol officers, all they do is to monitor their wives movement. Where r you? Who are you with? Going to where, for what? etc. Accusations;  flying helter skelter because she’s gorgeous. If u can’t handle it that she’s hot and can attract some attention and you can’t trust her to do right, then u should have married an unattractive woman like my friend did and had PEACE.

i do hope i don’t ruffle any feathers please ,no harm intended. I am just musing out loud, for me, there is nothing as nice as seeing a lovely couple together. like Barack and Michelle, Seal and Heidi Klum, Brad Pitt and Angelina. There is a positive and powerful energy that exudes from them like yes, we are meant to be together and we shall accomplish great things as one.

I am not that whimsical though not to have realized that all that glitters isn’t gold. Physical charm is really physical, it does fade. The light which never goes out is the flame which radiates from within like we all saw in Shrek and can come in an ugly form but is pure beauty when the shell is cracked. That is what my friend loves in his woman.

I have realized that we, as individuals, really do enter this marriage institutions for various reasons, aside from the obvious ones of marrying for love, connections, power, some people also make the decision for choosing a mate based on having his wife just for himself or to share her with others. I have learnt that men do think deep and from strange angles. Men are really from mars, women r we from Venus or is it all fallacy? Topic for another day.

Please air your views and enlighten us on qualities for choosing a spouse.


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