Part 2 advices from a brutha who loves the sistas.
ok, my sistas…got a couple more for your consideration.
#16…good pussy is not enough! i know it seems like all men are primarily concerned with hittin the ass, but believe it or not we want and need more than that from you. we need you to stimulate our spirits, as well as our loins! 🙂 we need you to inspire us to want to become better people for you. a woman who’s love and inspiration can convince a man to be better for her, is a keeper.
#17..don’t place more value on the relationship than you place value on your own integrity. Don’t be willing to do ‘whatever’ it takes to make a relationship work. Know your limits and make them known UP FRONT! If you sacrifice too much of who you are to accommodate all of who he is, the relationship loses balance, and thus compromising its full potential for growth
#18…believe in the POSSIBILITIES. have faith in the possibilities that an authentic spiritual connection with your mate can bring. far beyond a religious connection, i’m talking about the interconnectedness of your destinies, manifested through the actualization of divine perfection. expand your conception of what’s possible. think beyond what you know
#19…this dude ain’t the other dude. So, stop bringing your expectations and insecurities from your past relationships to this one. If you’re waiting for new dude to lick the coochie the same way the other dude did, you might as well go back to where you came from. Why assume this dude is gonna beat your ass cause the last dude did? This is a new possibility, so allow it to be.
#20…stop comparing your relationship to the relationships of your friends. Stop looking at someone else’s perceived ‘greener grass’, and spend some time fertilizing your own lawn. Just because her man does something you like, that doesn’t mean your man is required to do the same. If you want what her man does done to you, you need her man.
#21…get your OWN f*ckin’ man! Why would you want to try to ‘take’ a man from someone and then expect him to be faithful to you? Actually, most women who claim to like their girl’s man, don’t want them because they need the man, they do it to prove they can take the man. It’s an attempt to boost the ego of a woman who actually has very low self-esteem and an even lower sense of self-worth.
#22…be a porn star, at least in the privacy of your own home!! after you get over 21, all the sexual hang-ups get a little irritating. being a prude is the most unsexy thing in the world, and a guaranteed way for your relationship to have problems. i mean, you ain’t gotta do shit that’s physically impossible. don’t let him put something in your booty that you know can’t fit, but lil shit like giving head ain’t even considered freaky no more!! that shit stop being freaky in the 70s!!!!! find things you’re comfortable with, but if ordinary intercourse is all your willing to consent to, be prepared for the consequences.
#23….make up your damn mind!! all this back and forth, ambivalence and indecisiveness, is counterproductive. by the time the man you want comes into your life, you should already know he’s on his way, because you are already where you need to be, waiting for him. the universe gives us what we ask for through our actions and intentions, and most of us ask for the wrong things!
#24…a woman who REALLY knows sports, and doesn’t just watch it cause her man does, is quite sexy! learn to enjoy and BE KNOWLEDGEABLE about things that your man find enjoyable. if you’re not really into sports, don’t fake it because that will just piss him the fuck off…and you’re gonna sound stupid. if sports isn’t your thing, acknowledge it and keep it moving, so there will be no unrealistic expectations. but, if you really do enjoy it, and can watch the game with you man, and y’all can share the experience equally, you got your best friend sharing your bed!
#25…strive to be EXTRAORDINARY. In every aspect of your life, nor just your career, or as a parent, but in everything you do try to reach your fullest potential. make the pursuit of continual growth a priority in your life. Always want to be better tomorrow than you are right now, and make sure anyone you allow in your life has the same commitment to growth
#26…always smell good! the lotions and cremes and smell goods are a MUST!!! if i smell better than you, we got problems…and especially, ‘down there!’ i wanna take my time and enjoy myself when i take the plunge, not immediately look for the emergency exits. The hair smelling good, skin and feet nice and smooth…and mos def put some lotion on your booty! an ashy booty really sucks!
#27…Know what you’re looking for! Be precise about the qualities you want in a man. Most of us don’t get what we want, because we never decide what that is. And the qualities on your list should be less about who you are, and more about who he is!
#28…What is HAPPILY SINGLE? I was never happy when I was single…LOL I mean I wasn’t pressed, but to me the absence of sadness or pain does not equate to happiness. I’m not one of those people who believe we don’t need a mate to be whole. To the contrary, I believe in the divine order and balance of the universe represented by a complementarity of masculine and feminine energy to create a divine perfection.
#29…Allow yourself to be loved! a lot of us miss out on our truest loves because we are either AFRAID of what we think love is or are UNAWARE when authentic love presents itself to us. Be not only prepared, but also receptive when love comes, because it may not come back again. **DISCLAIMER: I DON’T BELIEVE IN ‘LOVE…but i know you do! 😉 **
#30…Knowing how to cook makes a woman a look a lot more muthafuckin’ fine! Sure, you can be fine while we’re ordering out or I’m cooking every night, but when I come in that kitchen, and you’re putting in work on that stove, that’s an aphrodisiac that hard to beat!